My husband and I have always had a mutual appreciation for the outdoors. However, 2020 caused us and everyone else to be stuck in our homes whether we liked it or not. In July of 2020, we felt our lives were halted and each day was the same as the last. So we decided to buy a National Parks Pass and start visiting National Parks.
Since we bought the pass, we’ve visited six National Parks: Yosemite, Sequoia, Joshua Tree, Death Valley, and Zion. Living in Southern California, many National Parks are relatively close by and the majority of our trips were over a weekend. By taking time to plan out and go on these excursions to the National Parks, we learned more about each other and it strengthened our relationship significantly. Here are 3 relationship lessons learned by visiting National Parks.
Lesson #1: Planning vs. Spontaneity
When it comes to planning vacations, my husband is usually more spontaneous and doesn’t like to plan far in advance while I am the complete opposite. I thrive on having a plan and sticking to an hour-by-hour itinerary. For my husband, a new idea will spawn in his head and he will be motivated to make it a reality. For example, when we were discussing what to do in Death Valley, I read online that it was popular to arrive early to view the sunrise from the Mesquite Flat Sand Dunes located just outside of the park. I thought we wouldn’t be able to do this because it’s a five hour drive from our city, but then my husband suggested starting the drive at 2 a.m. to get there in time to watch the sunrise. I was extremely hesitant at first, but was ecstatic once he offered to be the one to drive us through the dark and windy highway to the dunes.
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The drive there was really rough; we were exhausted, our Google maps wasn’t working, and we kept almost running into semi-trucks on the small two-lane highway (plus, we decided that was the moment to start eating sugar again after 3 weeks of nothing which led to us feeling sick). When we arrived at the dunes, everything was quiet and peaceful. Trekking through the sand for 45 minutes to get to the top of the dunes was a struggle but it was worth it starting the day off watching the sand and surrounding desert become lit up by the golden sunrise. However, throughout our park visits, there were times we got lost, didn’t arrive early enough and met crowds of hundreds of people. After this experience, I learned that planning and spontaneity both have their place in a relationship and it’s always best to know your limits and see what you can handle physically and mentally on any trip.
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Lesson #2: Suffering Together and Being Forced to Communicate Can Strengthen a Relationship
I think a great way to test (and hopefully strengthen) a relationship is to go on a long road trip. Any disagreements encourage compromise and being stuck in a car with one person for hours at a time lets you see them in their true form. My husband and I are very well-versed in how to succeed in a road trip. When we were dating our longest road trip was 12 hours from Utah to California, and it was actually fun. We’ve since figured out what music or podcasts to listen to, what snacks to get for each other, and when to talk or let the passenger sleep.
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Also, going into the wilderness means spotty cell reception, which was great because this forced us off of our phones and computers and getting to spend one-on-one time with no distractions. When we went to Sequoia National Park last summer, there wasn’t a lot of cell reception and we had to rely on the paper map we got from the park and each other to figure out where to go and what hikes or stops we should do. We were forced to completely turn our attention to each other which sometimes turned into petty fights about what viewpoints were worth it or what turn was the correct one. Our communication with each other has improved immensely since going on these trips together, and being able to suffer together and learn to help each other when we are in need and more about each other’s personalities.
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Lesson #3: Trust each other’s ideas
Something I realized is that trusting each other’s ideas can often lead to great experiences. Most recently we went to Zion National Park and through the extreme heat and crowds, we still had a great time exploring nature and learning more about each other. We visited the park on Memorial Day weekend, and were torn what to do since there were so many people there.
The most popular hikes like Angel’s Landing had a wait of four hours and parking was insanely hard to find inside and outside the park. My husband had the idea to avoid the bigger hikes since we had been to this park before, and we ended up going on a trail by the Virgin River that I had never done. I wasn’t sure at first because I wasn’t sure if the experience would be as glorious or magnificent as hiking on a trail while clinging to a loose chain 5,790 feet high, but we had great views of the red rock mountains and even pulled out our hammock to enjoy a more low key park experience.
Visiting National Parks
Way back in July of 2020, after visiting Yosemite National Park, I had the idea to buy the National Parks Pass and it’s something we now are grateful for and want to buy every year for the rest of our lives. The ultimate goal is to visit all 63 National Parks in the United States, which will provide countless opportunities to reconnect as a couple and see amazing natural wonders. These day-trips into the country’s most beautiful places has caused a new perspective on life in a time of global struggle.
We have now made it a goal to go on at least one hike a week in our area to stay in love with the outdoors and keep ourselves ready to hike anywhere anytime for the next park we visit. It’s also made me even more appreciative of my relationship and glad to have a best friend that also loves the outdoors. It’s encouraged us to be more active, be more engaged with each other, and most importantly have something new to keep looking forward to together.
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About the Author
Kara Turner is a writer, lover of the outdoors, and pop culture fanatic. She has a bachelor’s degree in communications from Utah Valley University and currently lives in Orange County, California with her husband. Follow her on Twitter: @KaraCTurner
